Aging like a fine wine.
Aging, especially as a woman, is seen as something to fear or hide from. A marker of your success or failure in life and to “look your age”… I mean how awful would that be….
**insert eye-roll here
It saddens me that so many people hate getting older, so much so that birthdays bring a sense of dread, or even a breakdown of sorts, and there is so much time, effort and money put into denying your age.
Don’t get me wrong, I understand.
To look in the mirror and not recognise the person staring back at you.
To feel like you haven’t quite hit the milestones you had hoped to hit by now.
To feel like your time is running out (especially biologically).
To be scared and stressed at the multitude of things that get added to your plate each year…
But what is the alternative?
To no longer be here.
That is the only way you can avoid aging, and to me that is definitely the lesser of the two options.
However, how do you learn to celebrate the extra candle? How do you genuinely appreciate the wrinkles that form or the navigate the fear that life is passing you by too quickly?
See yourself as a fine wine - you get better with age.
Acceptance is the first ingredient. Reminding yourself what the alternative to aging is and accept that to grow old is a part of life… should you be lucky enough to stick around.
Acknowledging the fact that your fear of aging, whilst understandable, has been amplified and manipulated by people and companies who wish to make money off your fear. All the anti-aging procedures and cosmetics are projecting the narrative that aging is something to avoid at all costs. These companies are controlling you, they have power over you. Reclaim that power back!
Practice Gratitude to help rewire your brain not to catastrophize. Comparison of others will keep you catastrophizing. Remind yourself of all the positives you have experienced, the privilege of having more time ahead of you and celebrate the fact that your time isn’t yet up. Possibilities still exist as long as you are here.
Live YOUR Life. One of the biggest set backs people have is living their lives to the beat of somebody else’s drum. The projections of other peoples expectations, of comparison, of societal norms and narratives…. screw them all, they hold you back from living your life. Ask yourself why aging is so scary to you. What does aging mean to you, and where does that come from? Let other people do them and you do you, regardless of your age.
Look after yourself. Like seriously. You are worth the effort. So stop looking for these quick fixes and buying into shortcuts, and instead just start to prioritise looking after yourself. Getting older becomes less hard (albeit it’s still hard and unpredictable) when you have looked after the vessel that is carrying you through life and when you have done the inner work to appreciate your worth beyond the aesthetic, or the markers of success set by others.
I know most of you will be stuck behind your wall of “this is all very well and good to say, but it’s easier said than done, and it’s not exactly a blueprint of change is it” but it’s time for you to knock this wall down. The stories you tell yourself become your truth, and yes the noise can also come from outside of you, but ultimately you need to start telling yourself a different story if you want things to change. And building a solid foundation with the things above will allow you to stop dreading the annual acknowledgement of your trip around the sun.
It is something to celebrate, not fear. So tell yourself every day that you are a fine wine, that keeps getting better with age and watch your experience of aging change.
